I am indeed pregnant!
Well after all my worrying that I might be too old to get pregnant or that my partner spends a bit too much time in the Turkish baths, I am indeed pregnant. In fact, I got pregnant a lot quicker than either my partner or I had thought I might. However, I feel both relieved and fortunate that it was so easy.
Actually, I’ve been pregnant for a while but I decided to keep it to myself for a bit. At least until I’d got past the terrifying hurdle of telling my mum (worry about nothing- she was fine about it).
So, rather than jumping straight into tales of the second trimester, I shall start at the beginning. Well obviously not right at the beginning!
Last time I was pregnant, (a long time ago), I could not stop myself panicking about it, for all kinds of reasons. I pretty much had a panic attack every day from the day I found out I was pregnant until I miscarried at about 9 weeks.
So I was a bit worried that this time, even though this was something I really, really wanted, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself freaking out and that I’d go into the usual loop of worrying about the possibility of panicking would make me panic. I am glad to report that rather than freaking, this time around, I have been much calmer than usual.
This is just as well, as you can’t take any of the medications I usually rely on to get me through difficult patches.
The rule for pregnancy is- if in doubt, leave it out! Generally the less medication of any sort you take the better, especially in the first three months. (However, it goes without saying if you are on regular medication for a mental health problem and you do find yourself pregnant, speak to your doctor first before you make any changes to your meds!)
Roman Chamomile, my relaxing tea of choice is a bit of an unknown quantity. Some herbal guides say it is fine, others say it is an abortifactant. So that’s off the menu.
Apparently, normal chamomile is ok. I have been using that occasionally but have not really needed it that much.
My other crutch is occasional Valium. This is also out. Apparently, it can cause birth defects.
However, I have recently relied far more on exercise than medication to get me through anyway. I and intend to maintain a good level of fitness throughout this pregnancy- more on this later.
As far as sedatives go, other than the odd cup of Chamomile tea, I’m pretty much on my own, sans chemical aid. However, as I’ve said, it hasn’t been bad at all; my main problem has not been anxiety but extreme nausea, for weeks and weeks and weeks. That and the fact that as well as no Valium or Roman Chamomile, I can’t have prawns, runny eggs, mouldy cheese, shark, peanuts, antihistamines, turkish baths or soft ice cream.
I miss my egg and toast soldiers but I am making up for it by getting my eggs in the form of cake.
Fortnight commencing 11/06/07
Medication: None
Exercise: 7 hr+
Alcohol: 1
Anxiety: Fine
Anxiety Level (0-10): 0
Number of Panic Attacks:1
Severity of Panic Attack (0-5): 4
Depression: I do have a tendency to burst into tears but I’m not actually depressed, just hormonal.
Depression Level (0-5): 0
Mania: I’m quite busy getting things done.
Mania Level (0-5): 1
Summary
Not sleeping very well (too many night time trips to the loo and not being able to sleep on my front anymore rather than anything sinister) and too busy to get as much exercise as I’d like (sorting out my house).
Having said that generally throughout this pregnancy I have been quite calm, last week I had a particularly bad anxiety attack caused not by being pregnant but by other circumstances.
However, this has been by far the exception rather than the norm, and I’ve been checked out since and everything is fine.
